~ you are BRAVE! and not a coward. so do it anyway! (the last time you were scared, it turned out to be the best decision of your life)

~ your habit of running away will eventually solve itself, when you feel True Home

~ you must kill the viewer in your head, and live as an individual with autonomy; not a film character, stop viewing yourself from outside of your body

~ save your money; practice for the future. when you live frugally in a tiny apartment drinking milk and eating herring.
   ~ if you do spend- purchase mostly art supplies, books, sweet treats